Tuesday, 22 September 2009

Desiring Purity

There were many times many years ago when I prayed to Allah SWT to grant me all the good qualities a man can have and exterminate from me all that is bad. My intention was simple. I wanted to be a man free from all bad habits and characteristics and acquire all that is good as much as what an ordinary man can hope to have. I was hoping though that this purification process would be an easy and instantaneous one, something akin to waking up one morning purified from any sense of arrogance, vanity, greed, envy and all other deadly sins and bad characteristics, and at the same time engulfed by the purest of all noble qualities - sincerity, humility, honesty etc.

It just doesn't work that way, does it? You don't get all these qualities and exterminate all that is bad that easily. You can't even learn how to do this in schools and universities. No amount of religious and moral education can guarantee a personality of such purity. Education may help to a certain extent but ultimately it is one's experiences in life that matters. And often, they involve hard and difficult moments.

For example, how does a person acquire humility and sincerity and eradicate from himself arrogance and vanity. Of course there are many who profess to be humble and sincere but are these really valid pronouncements or merely delusions? On the other hand, how can someone possibly know he is not selfish and arrogant? You may think so about youself but does that mean others must share the same assessment?

When I was making that do'a, I probably thought I wasn't far off from the ideal personality I wanted. I wanted to get married at that time and prayed to Allah SWT to bless me with a companion to enable me to complete the purification process. I honestly thought that was the only missing piece in me and once I get it everything will be smooth and easy.

I know now that I was and still am far off from that ideal. There were times in the past I perceived my own actions as honest expressions of self-confidence, totally ignorant of the fact that others saw them as signs of arrogance. At other times, I saw myself as standing firm to my beliefs and principles when in fact I was stubborn, inconsiderate and insensitive towards the feelings of others.

Purification of one's soul is not, has never been and will never be an easy process - something for us to contemplate on as we seek forgiveness from family members and friends in this blessed month of Shawal. Eid Mubarak!


Anonymous said...

An insightfull post. Will definitely help.

Karim - Creating Power

Zaki Samsudin said...

Salam Brother Karim.

Thank you for dropping by. I'm not sure whether my post was of any help, or are you offering me your help? Anyways, the link you left behind is very interesting. Reminds me of books by Napolean Hill, Zig Ziglair etc that I used to read.

Nabilah Bagarib said...

Very insightful Sir..

Munsyi said...

What a thoughful post.

Honesty and humility are actually tough subjects to tackle and it reflected to everyone outside if one truly have them.
I was your student during my sophomore year in 2005 and you're one of those humble teachers I've met though you may not know me since I just a quiet type and didn't speak up and stick out like a sore thumb.

One person that I extremely admire for his/her humidity is our beloved father-figure Tan Sri Prof. Mohd Kamal Hassan.Despite all the success he had achieved and all the important positions he has held throughout his career at IIUM,he was always and still is a simple guy,approachable and very down to earth.
When I was a student at IIUM,I used to bump into him in that ever-crowded HS cafeteria,in the mosque as we prepare for Zuhr and As'r prayer(even over the weekend)and saw him patiently waiting for his turn while lining up in front of ATM machine.
He is behaving like his is nobody and always be seen on the ground to keep in touch with the campus life and activities.You may heard a lot of important public figures you hardly seen in public unless something extremely important happening like a visit from a Minister but not to this former Rector.

I think he is the best role model of honesty,integrity and humility that we all aspired to.Sometimes we feel we are humble enough but people around you think you differently like that famous saying said "It is nice to be important but it is more important to be nice".

well, keep up the good posts Sir.

Zaki Samsudin said...

Nabilah, thanks for dropping by.

Munsyi, can't agree more with your comments on Prof Kamal Hassan. He is one of the most humble persons I've met in my life.